On My Mind

I have a few things on my mind this second day of August. The year 2017. This is the year my oldest starts elementary school.


I am dreading it. She is counting down the days. She is beyond ready. Me, not so much. I wish I could wrap her up and tuck her in my pocket. I am not ready to share her with the world or not have her by my side morning noon and night.


I know that this is a step in life we all must take however I never anticipated it being so hard on me. I have been working full-time since she was 10 weeks old. But I dropped her at daycare, nursed her at lunch until she was 2.5 years old and then picked her up. Come September I will drop her off and not see her for 11 hours! AGH! My husband will pick her up from school. He will get those first excited hugs and kisses, the entire day summed up in a two minute run on sentence. All the new and exciting things she did that day, the new friends she made, what the teacher told her and who had a sad or happy face. I will miss that. I know it will be so good for my husband and her relationship but I am going to miss it more than I ever anticipated.


I am hoping I can wrap my head around the fact that I will have a kindergartner in just 4 short weeks. Right now - I think I am in denial.


Edited to add: 8 days before her last day of preschool and I am NOT ready. Probably even dreading it a little bit more since I have seen all the back to school signs from friends and family that have already gone back. Luckily we have until the day after Labor Day. 


Please tell me this is normal. I am running through all the ways I can quite working and homeschool. So far I haven't come up with any really plausible answers unless winning the lottery happens tonight. It is $700 million or something.


My daughter is so excited so I am trying to encourage that enthusiasm and not show her that her momma's heart is cracking.


She has her backpack hung by the door, her menu ready, and her thermos lined up on the counter. 9 more days she exclaims.


If you think about it pray for peace for this mommy's heart and a joyful first day of kindergarten on Tuesday the 5th of September.

My Sweetie Pie

It might take me months but I will be certain to jot down ten things about each of my children. So onto baby #3 and my sweetie pie.


Our son, Baby H. We adore you. If you ask who's baby it is the girls immediately pipe in MINE in unison. To say he is adored is an understatement. He is beyond loved, mauled and never left alone, ever.


These are the ten things I currently love most about our littlest little love bug.


1. He is happy. Always.


2. He loves his momma. Always. Ha, while he is content to see everyone, he lights up when he sees me and there is nothing more special than seeing the love your children have for you!


3. He loves his pets. "Dog-dog" was word number 3 I think. He giggles in glee when our mastiff sits close enough for him to pet, yank, ride or kiss. (Yes we have very tolerant dogs who adore their babies too).


4. His squishy thighs. Our girls were tiny petite little things (still are at 25 and 27 pounds at 3 and 5 years old). But baby man he has some rolls and some squish and I have all of the heart eyes for it.


5. He knows what he wants and will tell  you. He picked up sign language and talking really early and fast. He is so happy to tell you more milk, eat, all done, no, yes, bye-bye. There is no guessing with him. He will tell you.


6. He loves all things trucks, trains and tractors. We didn't have a ton of baby boy toys and are just now starting to acquire it however he has always gravitated to the trucks, trains and automobiles. He even makes the little noises and I have no idea where he learned them. My girls are girly girls so this is super foreign and fun.


7. He is a great sleeper (and now I probably jinxed it) but he naps well and goes right to bed.


8. He is a great eater. Happy to try anything once, again such a foreign concept with my allergy baby (#1) and my reflux baby who refused all food until she was two! He is still happily nursing which I am content with, I am in no rush to wean him.


9. He is cuddly. He gives the best kisses and hugs. I love that he holds on to my shoulders so tight with his little fists. He also leans into his kiss and makes the muah sound. Melt my heart.


10.  That he is ours. Man I love all of my babies and I am just such a lucky mommy.

Sassafras

Too continue on with my what I most love about my children right now, I'm on to my middle little. My loving, sassy best sleeping middle. Man I just love and adore her little self.


Haddie-hoo, our sour patch kid.


This one keeps me on my toes in the best way. Okay so for ten things.


1. I adore her sleeping. She is a 12-13 hour straight through the night and one nap a day gal, still at 3 years old. Thank you, thank you, thank you! After the first never sleeping and dropping all naps at 2 - its so nice.




Haddie on her birthday :)

2. I love the way that she chose her self soothing methods early on in life. Pointer and middle finger on her right hand along with a swaddle blanket she affectionately calls "bop".

3. Her lashes. She has the most amazing natural eye lashes. Dark thick and super long. Her eyes really are just amazing.

4. Her spunk. Man I just love her spunk. Perhaps its bc we are both the middle man, but she is fiercely independent and spunky. Her teachers always tell me she is spririted and I wont have to worry about her in school. She keeps everyone on their toes in the best way possible.

5. Her fierce determination. She is determined with anything she sets her mind too. Riding her bike, crossing the monkey bars, keeping up with big sis. I cannot believe the things she can do and accomplish at the tender age of 3.

6. Her complete opposite of her sister personality. I love how different she is, Charli says yes, she says no. She is the red rose to Charli's white rose. Darker skin complexion, hazel eyes, brunette hair. Stockier build. Everything.

7. Ability to make friends immediately. She is so outgoing and friendly until she is not and then watch out. She can make friends in an instant.

8.  Fast walk. Man can she walk fast. You would think her short stature of a mear 34" would make it hard for her to keep up with me and my 34" inseam but nope, she easily keeps up if not passes me.

9. She is not boxable, as in, she isn't a girly girl or a tomboy. She is a happy mix of both worlds. SHe loves dolls and dress-up. But also loves mud and trucks, the sandbox and paw patrol. She can throw a ball better than some of her 4 year old boy friends and feed a baby at the same time.

10. Most of all I just love how much she adores her siblings. She is a mamas girl and her sister and brother are her best friends. I hope it stays like that forever!

Haddie, Charli and Hayes

My Joy

So I saw another blogger  Shannon do this and I thought what a great way to preserve the here and now.


So I will start off with my eldest .. The one who made me mommy, my miracle!


Charlize, affectionately known as Charli.  4 years 11 months and 9 days, on the downslide to one whole hand.


1. I love her enthusiasm. When she loves something, she truly loves it. She gets  so excited about coloring a rainbow, playing with bubbles, twinning with me or her sister. The little things. I hope that never leaves her.


2. Her selflessness. She always thinks of her brother, sister and loved ones. If we are at the store, a birthday party or she is accompanying me to work - she will be sure to make a memento, buy a treat or take a picture to show her siblings and parents what she is up too. She makes cards and pictures for her friends and anyone she thinks may need a pick me up.


3. Her hair, she has long gorgeous blonde hair. It is super straight just like mom's but its glowing and very very long. She isn't afraid to cut it though, bc she enjoys a good spa day and she knows its only hair.


4. Her love of babies. Her love rivals my own and let me tell you my baby love is strong. Give me all the babies but I'd have to fight over them with Charli. She is such a great big sister. Like really great. There is very little fighting in our house. I never have to worry about sharing or someone not being included. She is the best big sister in the land! And I know she'll be a wonderful babysitter. She is begging for just ONE MORE BABY.


5. Crafts. She loves crafts. Drawing painting sewing creating. She adores it and is good too.


6. Her love of learning. Math, writing, reading and science. She loves to learn. She is in a kindergarten class and learning above and beyond her 4 year old age. You cannot give her enough of it. Her little sponge mind takes it all in and her memory is amazing. Song lyrics (gets that from her dad, numbers, books she hears it once it's ingrained.


7.  Her love of the outdoors and animals. While she is my girly-girl through and through she is not afraid of snakes, bugs or spiders. She makes friends with everything. She rides ponies, walks the dogs, plays with goats, pigs and chickens. She wants to be a veterinarian like mom when she grows up and it certainly makes me proud!


8. Her shyness. I know that sounds odd but I enjoy having those hugs and cuddles when she is nervous. She is not the first to run and greet you (that would be her sister) she makes you work for it. Those that do are thoroughly rewarded. She is warm and kind when she warms up.


9. Her sense of humor.  This girl loves to make jokes and if she can get you laughing she'll never stop.


10. Her love. She is the loviest,

most warm hearted kid I know. Hugs, kisses, books, and pictures galore. She loves to love. There is no doubt in my mind I am her world and I hope she knows that she is mine too!

The Birth Story - 3rd Edition

We made it. To the date the doctors had set to break my water. I was in shock and elated that I no longer had to worry about the side of the road incident.


We checked into our room at the hospital (after a very tearful good bye to the girls) around 5:30PM on Sunday April 10th. The nurses came in and checked me. The look on their faces when they realized how far along I was without any signs of labor (well I was having consistent contraction, but to me they seemed normal as I had them from about 20 weeks). The nurse called the doctor to let her know I had arrived and was in "active" labor. After a brief chat the doctor explained the situation and told them to hold off on doing anything. She had two other women coming in labor and needed to assess the situation. They asked me if I wanted to go home and come back in the morning. No I did not want to leave my children again. I wanted to have my baby. So we planned on staying over in the hospital. The husband and I chatted, watched some TV, he got yummy takeout, I was told no food :( I had consistent contractions all night.


I woke up took a shower and was allowed food at 7:30AM. So I showered ate 1/2 an omelet and drank some water. All of the sudden the contractions picked up and I had to walk through them. The dr came in and told me her plan " she had a scheduled surgery in the next building at 8AM, it would take about an hour. Get an IV going in the event I needed Pitocin and she'd come break my water at 9AM". Okay. The nurses came in a 8:45 to start putting in my IV. At 9AM I asked them to stop so I could use the bathroom. At 9:02 I needed help off the toilet as I felt the head, I asked my husband to call the nurse back in, 9:08 the nurse came in and then called the dr to come now. 9:12 I was getting ready to push, my water was still in tact, 9:15 the dr arrived and broke my water and there was lots of blood (my placenta always starts coming away from the uterine wall at the time the baby comes out hence the blood). 9:18 after a scary minute of no heart rate and the dr telling me if I didn't push the baby out right then I was going in for ER surgery. I pushed with all of my mite and 9:19 our son made his appearance.


Less than 20 minutes of active birth. Thank the heavens above we were already at the hospital.


We had a boy. A beautiful, angry little boy who was very mad about being forced out into this world. (He screamed non stop for about 40 minutes, he's been an angel since).


Apparently his head was wedged in my pelvis at a funny angle and he was face up that prevented him from coming out sooner (another blessing) it also caused some damage to mommy and bruised baby's head and face from the fast and furious delivery.